how i'm continuing to live beautifully broken
8:22 AMHola readers!
It's been a hard week. A really, honest to goodness hard week.
For all of those who have ever wondered how I can say I live beautifully broken and how I've continued in that despite all my shortcomings and failings and the darkness surrounding me...
This post is for you.
I am a sinner.
A deep, horrible, mess-up, sinner.
I know we hate that word. No one likes to be called a sinner. But it's truth. I'm a sinner - we all are. We are all at some point going to realize how far from perfect we are. Maybe you haven't felt that now, but at some point you will, because we truly are not good enough. You are never going to be good enough in the eyes of the world, and deep down we all realize we are not good enough for God.
And I felt that at a very young age. I realized that verse in the Bible that says, "for all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God," means something and was never more true for my life. I realized that hell was real, that it is more then a cuss word, that it is real, and horrible, and a place I honestly deserve to be.
And that's when I decided to run that race - the race of freedom, the race towards the bigger and better journey called heaven. And I realized that after this world there is more, that I needed my Savior who died so I could live, and I took that chance called becoming a Follower of Christ.
And I wish I could say I never looked back, but I do...every day. I've never regretted my decision but I've stumbled and fallen and been forgiven over and over and over. To continue this walk with my Savior has been a broken journey...a broken but beautiful journey.
I have found vulnerability
We need to be open. We need honesty. We need to realize that we are far from perfect, that we don't have all the answers, that deep down we are messed-up humans. This is to be beautifully broken, this is what it takes to heal. Honestly, without being open I cannot see a way to healing.
Without being completely open about your sin to those around you, without asking for forgiveness, without seeing your imperfections, you can never truly be beautifully broken. To be broken is to be open before God first and foremost, but secondly to those around you.
God says that if we confess our sins He will be faithful and just and forgive us, that He will be able to work in our lives. That is why I began to blog, this is why I blog. I blog because it is my outlet to honesty, to being open, to confession. Maybe it looks different for others, but for me, my place of confession can often start with my blog.
I have found my outlet
I found my outlet, my best way of communicating, of letting go. I've learned the important of doing what you are good at and giving God the glory and not yourself, because God is the Creator, the worker of Life. We don't even have the ability to breath without Him.
I love to write and when I write what I am called to write I feel closer to Him. When I take photos of his Creation and it is just me and Him, I can't explain it but I draw nearer to Him. When I am with those in my community and helping others, I feel closer to Him.
When I recognize Him in every facet of life, I feel closer to Him Who made me. Who made you. Who made everything and calls it good.
I have found community
To be broken is not something that makes you alone. Once I learned to be open, once I learned to be vulnerable with friends and family and those in my life, I found community. I found the me too moments of this life. Community is important - finding those who will uplift me, take me further then I ever thought possible, who shine with Jesus - those people mean so much to me, because they can encourage me in ways that no one else can.
I don't shun other people.
My personality is one that tries to make friends wherever she goes, but I still love the Christian community, I love my church and finding other blogs that speak Truth in my life. This is important, is us what every soul longing for Jesus needs - community.
I have found that God likes to use my scars best
God uses my imperfects almost more then He uses the things I am best at. I was never good at being open and yet I speak most about vulnerability on this blog. I use to hate chaos (and I still do), yet my summer job is filled with sometimes more of that then I feel I can handle. I use to hate being surrounded by crowds and yet I could have 50 people with me at a time on the job.
God likes to take our weaknesses, our dirt, and brokenness, and point it all back to His power and His glory. We've all fallen short but He takes us anyway. Admitting that out loud, living it, soaking in that Truth, has truly allowed me to be free even though I fall, even though I continually mess up.
I am so far from perfect, but I am continue saying I am beautifully broken, can continue to blog about that, because God has rocked my world and shown me incredible love.
I can be a follower of Him only because of Him letting go of his Son for a time, allowing Him to die for you and me, yet to rise again on the third day.
How can I not allow my imperfections to shine for Him if that is what He does best? How can I not blog about what He's done? How can I not proclaim good news?
My world is full of darkness, but Jesus gives my heart light, and that is something to live for, that is how I have continued - not because of what I can do, but what He can. It is how I am beautifully broken, how I can live each day.
Let's chat! If you have any questions about my journey or wanting to proclaim for yourself that you are beautifully broken but don't know how, we can honestly chat. I love people and I love you! Send me an e-mail at authorkaralynn@gmail.com and we can talk...or shoot me your e-mail through the comments (which will not be published).
Have a blessed weekend readers!
8 of your thoughts
I have been learning much recently about just how important community is in our brokenness! Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteAlso, love that wall in the first picture. Very epic looking!
Thanks so much - and it was VERY epic! I took the photo while in Florida and the red door was perfect for pictures! <3
DeleteWow, amazing post, Kara.
ReplyDeleteI love how honest your posts are, you show you as you are - as we all are: sinners in need of a Savior. And you point back to Jesus.
That’s what we need to do. We can’t lock everything up inside, we need to be open and honest and real.
Thanks for sharing this!
Aw thanks girl - your comment means a lot to me! I'm sorry it's been taking me so long to post your words, but I'm not used to this google problem that doesn't tell me when I have comments. XOXO
DeleteThank you for being SO real and raw. Being able to admit that you're a sinner takes a lot of humility and it is a beautiful thing <3
ReplyDeleteThank YOU for your beautiful comment, Lauren. <3 XOXO
Delete"I have found that God likes to use my scars best. God uses my imperfects almost more then He uses the things I am best at." This is a lesson I've been learning a lot of late. I don't have to be perfect. God can use my mistakes to make things work in a much better way than any plans I could've made.
ReplyDeleteKara, I just LOVE coming and reading your blog. Thanks for always posting such encouraging and uplifting messages. ♥
AWW thank you girl - and I love you!!! It's been too long, we MUST talk!!!! <3
DeleteComments make me smile, lift my spirits and give me the motivation to continue writing. In return I'll comment on your blog, because you're awesome and deserve it.