I turn 20 next month |what being a teen has taught me|
7:24 AM
Hola readers!
I turn 20 next month.
To put that into words is a bit on the scary side. I think about when I turned thirteen and the excitement of being a first-time teenager. I remember rocking out in my first flannel shirt, converse shoes, and short haircut, feeling completely cool and finally in style. I got my first cell phone when I got my drivers license at seventeen, and I flew for the first time on an airplane at nineteen this past May to visit a bestie in Florida. I've lost friends and gained some. I got my first job, graduated High School, spent some time in college, dyed my hair, visited Lancaster to see the Sight and Sound Theater, gone to dozens of concerns, got Instagram...I've done so much, seen so much, it's crazy to even consider leaving this phase, and yet I am so ready to put the teen years behind me.
There's a certain image teens have given...the rebellious, naive, self-centered generation that we can be.
But we don't have to be this way. We can rise from this harmful label and be so much more as teens - as young adults.
I may not be the smartest human out there, but I enjoy listing, and recently I was thinking about what God has taught me in the last six to seven years as I've grown from girl to adult....
- There's no such thing as cool. Be who you want to be
This advice means in the limits, of course. But I'm seeing so much defined as either cool or not by the world, and as teens we can eat it up. We ignore yesterdays style because some fashion designers so happened think it was time for a change. We mock the ones struggling mentally, and yet are going through the same thing ourselves. We take selfies and post continual pictures of ourselves, building a picture perfect image.
We are the generation that says be yourself but mocks the very people who do just that.
- Being a Christian means more then a label
I don't know how many people I know label themselves as Christians and do nothing more then say they are. Christianity isn't a label that you can slap on and go home-free. If Christianity is no more than a label for you, then you are missing out on so much.
- If you feel you will be lost without it (and it's not Jesus), you're not really living
For so long I wanted that phone like all my friends were getting. I was embarrassed that I didn't so much as own a laptop. But I've learned that I need to refuse to allow what I own or do not own define me. If I can look at sometime in my life and it's become a need, a something I obsess over, that has become my all, I need to take a step back. My phone, my books (I'm a nerd), my own personal style, how people look at me, what I major in college...if all of that has become my all, than it's time to let go (even for if but a moment) and reevaluate my life, because I cannot live that way.
- Dance like no one is watching
Seriously. Do it. Live life and don't care who's watching.
I spent so much time as a teen caring about what people thought when deep down all I wanted to do was be myself. So I'm learning to dance (literally and figuratively) to dance like no one is watching. It's worth trying.
- Choose what you want to do in life
I'm tired of teens choosing to do something because....they feel they have no choice. When you graduate High School, pick to do what you want and stop letting the world tell you. If you don't want to go to college, pursue what you want and go after that dream. If you want to go to college, pick your major, not the one the world tells you is best.
- It's okay not to date or go to prom
I didn't, I lived. Yes, I was homeschooled and I probably define how everyone imagines a homeschooler, but I'm almost 20 and I lived, I turned out okay (or at least I think I did....? Maybe you should ask my parents?). Don't let sex or your love-life (or lack thereof), be your all. Your High School years won't be any less if you don't date or go to prom, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
- Get a job young
I wish I had, but I waited until I'd graduated and that made doing adulting hard. Get a job young, work hard, save your money, be ready to do what you want (or at least get a head start) as soon as possible, because in the end, it is so worth it!
- Don't be afraid to try homeschool
I know people who hate school, want to try being homeschooled in High School, but think it's too hard or they'll lost friends. I was lonely in homeschool yes, but that was my own issues I dealt with. Not everything is the same. If you feel lonely, you can change that, but choosing whether or not to go to school does not define that or make or break you. There's many High Schoolers and Middle Schoolers more lonely then some homeschoolers I know.
Homeschooling in High School allowed me to graduate earlier than I normally could - my sister actually graduated at sixteen. So don't be afraid of homeschool - especially for the last year - I highly encourage you too look deeper into it if school isn't your thing.
- Take a gap year
After you graduate high school, take a break, get a job, make money, spend time with family, rest. A gap year is the best thing I ever did - except I stopped midway, and I regret it. Take a full year to reflect if you don't know what you want to do. It will honestly allow you to grow, research, and really think about the next step.
- Used cars are the best
My family has never owned a new one and we probably never will. Used cars are my lifeline - don't be afraid of them. Seriously, if you have to get one for even just a year and save for a better one, go for it.
- Be honest
Teen years are scary, sometimes lonely, depressing, and so full of drama. Do not let that define you, take you, or make you. You are not alone. Be honest in your brokenness, find people who are there for you, encourage you, and don't tear others down. Don't be afraid of not being popular, of going against the crowd. Don't be afraid of going against what the world says. Be honest with yourself and others. Be honest with God. Be honest with those in your church. Be honest about who you are.
I turn twenty August 31. Sometimes I feel like an old-soul, like I should have been twenty a long time before this. At times I look around me and the young teens of today feel like ages from me. I don't relate when it comes to the latest trends so kids at work often find me funny. I've never had a boyfriend (and apparently that shouldn't be a 'thing'?) and my lack of a using a cell phone is just not doable in their eyes.
I'm just an old soul turning twenty, and I'm okay with that. Life is busy, hectic, full of chaos, but I'm learning to stand up for who I am and who God is, and not what the world is saying.
I think twenty and I will get along just fine.
24 of your thoughts
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ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteKeep fighting the good fight Even - I know God is doing great things in your life!!!
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Deletewill do! The fight is worth it.
DeleteHappy birthday! All of the lessons you learned are amazing. <3
ReplyDeleteGreat post, and used cars really are the best!
Aww thanks for the month early b-day!!! And yes, aren't they though?! I'm really looking for a jeep....a wrangler would be nice but a jeep in general haha.
Deleteas long as a car is usable it is good. I want a 1989 Ford Ranger cause the things are reliable and cheap as dirt. I've seen some as cheap as $800 and a down payment of only 15 dollars per month
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DeleteTwenty. You grew up so fast!- June
ReplyDeleteYou're not too young yourself, bud. ;)
DeleteI turn 20 on September 30, and am not ready one bit. These are great lessons! Especially the "getting a job" one. I was one of those crazy kids who wanted a job since I was 14, but I didn't end up working until I was 17 and am so glad I did. It pushed me out of my homeschool comfort zone, made me more comfortable in my skin, and I learned how to work hard even when I didn't feel like it.
ReplyDeleteSo I definitely agree. Turning 20 is an odd but somewhat exciting feeling :P
Happy early birthday!!
Turning 20 really is an odd feeling but I'm so ready for all the new adventures. A job at 18 made me realize how I should have strove for one earlier because honestly I needed it to push me, but oh well. It's one thing I learned from. Thanks so much for the b-day wishes!
DeleteBlessings! XOXO
I'll put your birthday on my calendar so you will get a proper happy birthday when its your birthday
Deleteit's a new chapter in life.... and each chapter of life has so much God brings. The fun part is not knowing what will happen!
DeleteLove this!! It's so crazy you're turning 20!! Happy early birthday. :)
ReplyDeleteNabila | Hot Town Cool Girl
It really is - I started the blog when I was thirteen, and now to be almost twenty is a bit mind-blowing. XOXO
DeleteLovely photos. :) And I enjoyed reading all your lessons - I agree! It's a weird feeling to not be a teenager anymore, but each season of life has its own lessons and beauty. Thanks for sharing! xx
ReplyDeleteThank you Jess - it is a weird feeling to be leaving this time in my life, but it's also exciting to begin a new chapter. <3
DeleteThis was a wonderfully put together reflection! A post that you can for sure look back on and smile about- I can tel you've grown a lot by what you are reflecting about.
ReplyDeleteThanks girl - I honestly have. There's so much in my life that is not the same. I really have become an old soul, and I think I'm going to really like twenty. <3
DeleteI love this! I turned 18 recently (also a big birthday) and have spent a lot of time thinking as well. Your thoughts are lovely; I enjoyed reading them so much, and learning a bit as well. :)
ReplyDeleteHappy birthday to a great friend and sister in Christ!!!
ReplyDeleteLove you and God bless!!!
Your cousin,
Hannah B.
Thank you Hannah - love you!!!! <3
DeleteComments make me smile, lift my spirits and give me the motivation to continue writing. In return I'll comment on your blog, because you're awesome and deserve it.